The details make all the difference

Today is homecoming day; we're back at home in the UK and Kathleen is back home in Florida. I had the first lengthy conversation with my sister since the op. I had no idea what a difficult time she had and my heart strings were pulling like mad. The details that make such a huge difference when one is so vulnerable. For instance, being in the recovery room for 2.5 hours longer than expected caused her great despair. Tears ran down my cheeks as she relived the desperation she felt. She was in severe pain and all she wanted was to be with her mom and partner.

During the first few days, she was having a very difficult time managing the pain. Her morphine was a self-administered pump, which could be used in no less than every 6 minutes. This method worked fine when she was awake, but obviously was not as effective when she was sleeping. The pain became so unbearable and she was unable to sleep, despite her fatigue. And then when she was finally asleep, nurses came in to give her something to sleep (I never could understand why hospital staff wake you to give you sleeping pills or injections???) Fortunately after a few different approaches, the pain was brought under control.

The most challenging aspect of this whole situation was that she was away from her girls. Despite how much she'd miss them, she decided it was best they stay with friends and not see her in such a state. I can only imagine how difficult this was for her, as her girls are the centre of her universe. She loves them so much and they are so close. Even upon coming home, Christina was not able to enter the house because she had a cold, so she had to stay at the next door neighbours until she was no longer contagious.

It's extraordinary the little things - those key distinctions - we take for granted but make all the difference in the moments we experience. They impact the meaning we associate. They influence where we live emotionally and how we live.

There are no ordinary moments. Blessings to you and everyone. xp